


senbonzakura

by LandLine



Category: Bleach
Genre: F/F, F/M, Female Kurosaki Ichigo, Light Angst, Mutual Pining, One Night Stands, Pining, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:28:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25950637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LandLine/pseuds/LandLine
Summary: She thinks it’s a little bit silly, and a whole lot sad, but she feels like a child sometimes, when she realizes they have known each other for decades. Her few years of being in love with Rukia and loving Renji feel, absurdly insignificant to her.....“Why am I here Byakuya?” the words escape her; they had been swimming around in her head since the moment she arrived. She knows it’s too honest, feels the shame of her brashness hot on her skin, to her horror she can feel her eyes well up. It’s been too much.
Relationships: Abarai Renji/Kuchiki Rukia, Abarai Renji/Kurosaki Ichigo, Kuchiki Byakuya/Kurosaki Ichigo, Kuchiki Rukia & Kurosaki Ichigo, Kuchiki Rukia/Kurosaki Ichigo
Comments: 4
Kudos: 63





	senbonzakura

It’s a fairly normal Sunday morning, she’s back at Karakura visiting her sisters and her old man, when black wings bring in the wedding invitation. It takes a few minutes for the words to make sense to Ichigo, this is the first time anyone has sent one of this little messengers to her. She isn’t sure she should even be able to hear them here like this, the sound is not unlike a whisper, but the words flow like wet air from a crack on a stone wall, cold, soft and almost not there at all. 

“Ah! It’s finally here!” Isshin is happy, the echo of the words ringing something awful on her chest, it may very well be her heart, it feels like it’s trying to crawl out of her throat.  
“What’s going on?!” Yuzu is hiding a smile, good old dad is already up and about going on about love and destiny, about adoptive daughters and…  
“Ichi?” Karin is staring at her, and suddenly Yuzu is distracted from all the corny whining that’s going on under mom’s portrait. The longer she lets the silence stretch on, the worse they’ll worry, she plasters on the best smile she has for them. 

“Oh, you know, Renji finally asked Rukia to marry him, and she said yes.” The black butterfly is still resting on her finger, wings moving and reflecting sunlight. 

There is no RSVP, no writing cards or sending back messages letting the happy couple know that she’ll be attending, because of course there aren’t, because of course they don’t do the polite thing and wait. Or tell her in person. But she guesses it’s alright when Renji and Rukia coming in a day later to her Tokyo apartment, faces bright and glowing with matching smiles. Well, her joy at seeing them so happy is true. She can’t begrudge them their happiness, this fairytale love story of theirs, from childhood friends to lovers, it’s disgustingly beautiful. Something that she has read pan out in countless of mangas, Yuzu’s of course, those destined romances she will die swearing are awful but make her heart swell. 

They leave with dawn, laughing still and hanging on the doorway long enough to give her a hug each. Rukias scent lingers, and she can feel Renji´s warmth lulling her to sleep. She is not a child, for all that she feels unbearably young.

Her hands are calloused with all the years of fighting, her fingers are strong and nimble. She can’t help but wonder if Rukia's feel the same, if the same roughness clings to her even in the softest of caresses. In the morning it seems worse, but she wonders how Renji's warm and thicker fingers would feel on her, if they would make her moan, if Rukia would catch them with kisses. The shame that follows never fails to turn those last edges of pleasure into cold disgusting panic. The sun somehow makes it even worse.  
So up she goes, leaving warm sheets and soft dreams of Shinigami behind, getting ready for a long day at the hospital. Her patients there keep away the throbbing pain of love and wanting, there is no room for it, she changed blades but she´s still fighting. 

Sometimes the thoughts come up like bubbles, making her blush and scowl and snap back perhaps too harshly to their teasing. 

Everything happens very fast after that. But Ichigo guesses this is a wedding with decades in the making, so every detail has been thought and talked about long before she even met them. Probably before even they knew it themselves. There is no doubt Byakuya was planning long before they admitted to anything. For even though they are childhood friends turned lovers, everything about their union must follow the protocol required of the official union between a Kuchiki noble and a lieutenant of the Gotei 13. 

It doesn´t burn Ichigo to know that they knew and didn´t tell her, it doesn´t hurt to know they knew and they loved each other and she didn´t know how much or how it doesn´t include her. And she thought she really did, and it doesn´t hurt it really doesn´t and she will be happy for them and it is fine. It is. Except it isn´t. The morning still hurts and the light still catches her breathless and heartbroken. 

The details escape her, the wedding pressing at her forefront. For a crazy moment she wishes Grimmjow would just hurry the fuck up with whatever he is dealing with, longs for the distraction. Who knows, perhaps she is distracted enough and he can rip her arm off or at least break it and free her from the fucking pressure that’s choking her.

She thinks it’s a little bit silly, and a whole lot sad, but she feels like a child sometimes, when she realizes they have known each other for decades. Her few years of being in love with Rukia and loving Renji feel, absurdly insignificant to her. 

She has read this before, shit, she has seen it, in countless fucking movies. It feels like mocking, but Yuzu insists on it the next time she visits, the thing about My fucking best friend’s wedding, is that it just reinforces what she knows, she´s a piece of shit. It´s pretty much pettiness what has her heart pounding acrid envy and envying Cameron Diaz of all fucking things. Ichigo needs to cool down from all the love nonsense movie and manga binging, but it’s been the only thing that’s been keeping her from reaching out to Kenpachi for some honest to god regular sparing. She thinks her mom would be proud, managing emotions like … well... better than most at least. 

This wedding needs to hurry the fuck up and be over before she jumps head first into the world of masochism. Or worse, before she starts going through her dad’s Rom-Com collection. 

In a blind panic she realizes she really can’t wear the formal furisode she owns, pink and silk and full of snow covered sakura, with embarrassing petals flowing at the sleeves. Ichigo thinks about calling for help, but all she can think about is Rukia or perhaps Yorouichi, but well… Her fingers move before she can think of how useless it really is to ask Renji for help, but he does so laughing at her and then surprisingly taking her to a shop in soul society that caters to most seated officials that aren’t really of noble blood.  
“What, like I’m gonna let my best friend embarrass herself with her horrible taste in clothing!” Renji is teasing, he’s happy, Ichigo has never seen him so happy before, its infectious, his stupid smile taking away any and all snarky remarks she could make about his eyebrow tattoos or his embarrassing cleavage. 

“Wouldn’t dream of it” She rolls her eyes at him, not quite hiding the smile that’s pulling on the corner of her lips. She doesn´t pull her punch and he nearly topples over with a laugh that has her feeling guilty for how it makes her heart flutter, so she scowls and grumbles a soft “Idiot”. 

Her kimono is bright blue with printed waves, there are golden clouds spiraling at the neck and the obi is red with printed flowers. It’s beautiful, the lady at the store asks her to consider it a gift, a token of gratitude for the savior of Soul Society. There is no convincing her of accepting payment. Ichigo stutters out her thanks, she goes for a bow, blushing as red as her hair and making Renji struggle to keep a straight face. His manners leave as soon as they reach the corner and a belly laugh shakes him. 

Renji is still laughing and poking fun at her when they walk past the Kuchiki’s pond garden, Ichigo feels a little sorry for disturbing the koi at the bottom when she kicks his legs from under him making the lieutenant fall with a very loud splash. Her laugh is high like ringing bells, and it’s followed by Renji’s cry of outrage about poor mannered friends, but there is joy in his face as he is chasing her screaming bloody murder to traitor berries. 

She ends up spending a week with them at the Kuchiki Estate. She will have to pull double shifts and cover up for some doctors when she returns, but the sun feels like a welcomed beginning here, her heart is lighter. 

For all that she spends her evenings with Renji whenever he's free, her nights she fills talking and laughing with Rukia. Perfect hours that fly away until dawn chases away the very last shadows. Ichigo takes to falling asleep holding Rukias hand, just like that first night after she rescued her from execution. 

On her last day she wakes up before Rukia, and spends those first few minutes alone listening to her soft breathing. Mesmerized by the warmth of her body, the air that she exhales dancing on her lips. And perhaps she could spend her life basking in the wonder that is Rukia. She feels her heart starting to beat faster, she could've spend the rest of her life just like this, if only she had given Ichigo a chance. 

Rukia is waking up, blinking away the last of her dreams, a soft smile claiming her face as her eyes focus on Ichigo. The dawn is alive on the brilliant purple in her eyes, she is struck by her beauty. Once more tempted to pull her in, to kiss her, wrap her arms around her, to part her legs and taste her. She feels vile, coveting what is honestly not hers, not even a little. 

“Good morning Ichi”, the petname never fails to make her frown even as her heart skips a beat. Rukia starts moving, stretching and uncovering a leg. 

“Morning” she half smiles half mumbles, hiding a yawn that is horribly forced. Ichigo is not quite ready to surrender the warmth under the covers.

“Can you believe I'm going to be someone’s Wife?” it's said with wonder, with happiness and camaraderie. She is already sitting up, not spearing a look at her. 

“...to an idiot, no I can't” But she can, Ichigo is such a fool she could be her wife too. There is no sting to her words, and Rukia knows it, but there is sadness clinging to her eyes that is missed because Rukia is starting her day and Ichigo can´t make herself move. 

That day she avoids Renji, running away from the estate as soon as she can without worrying Rukia. Her feet have a mind of their own, her body knows what it needs even if her heart doesn't. Ichigo walks by the 11th, finds Yachiru and plays one mean game of hide and seek before running into Kenpachi. The impromptu sparring is great, even if it takes only an hour and by the end Kenny has to carry her to the 4th to Unohana. She is laughing the whole way there, it's probably not helping with the bleeding, but Yachiru is wonderful in all her righteous fury, raining tiny fists on Kenpachi for spoiling their game of hide and seek. 

The stab wound is not at all a problem for Unohana, Ichigo makes sure to nod and smile thanking the Taicho for her efforts. Kenpachi is there smiling like the madman he is, not at all ashamed and teasing her for becoming so slow without constant invasions to keep her in shape. Unohna is not pleased, but it’s hard to miss the amusement in her eyes. They say doctors make the worst patients but Ichigo likes to think she is like in many things the exception. 

"Ichigo!! What happened?!" Rukia storms in like Artemis personified, it’s beautiful and she is rendered speechless. That is until she remembers why exactly she's here and then Ichigo is scoffing.

She goes back to Tokyo, to an empty apartment and two weekends of double shifts. But there is a promise to Rukia to come back soon for tea before the wedding, and a rematch from Kenpachi, who was bewildered to be able to stab her once and split her lip open. 

She lets the days add up and pass. Apparently she missed the impromptu tournament between the 11th and the 6th, but surprisingly Kenpachi drops by one week later at her apartment. He´s wearing a gigai, and carrying with him a bottle of sake and a couple of steaks, and relays the whole thing in wonderful detail. She laughs so hard at his account of beating Renji’s ass to kingdom come, her side is aching something awful and promptly stands up to fetch the captain a beer, he’s earned it. There is a glint on his eye that she misses, but it’s knowing, kind and amused, she only catches the amusement part of it. 

She arrives early, a couple of days before the wedding to help Rukia and Byakuya with whatever she can. But there is a lot that goes over her head regarding the politics of wedding planning and all the other little things the siblings are micromanaging all over the event. She is pretty much useless and mostly spends her evenings with Renji, hunting and laughing. On a whim they get their minds set on procuring fireworks for the wedding, it takes a full afternoon to go to Kukaku to ask her, but they make a whole thing out of it, and it’s fun and wonderful. She is fine, its fine, everything is fine, she is happy. Her mantra is to not think too hard why her heart feels like it’s being crushed by stone hands, just stop thinking, be glad, it’s great, it’s love. 

They have dinner together, a day before the wedding. There are some relatives she doesn’t know by name or position or well, at all. But they sit close together and they all laugh and talk, even Byakuya is letting some amusement show. It’s great, they are recounting Rukia their evening with the Kukaku, but between one breath and the next Rukia feeds Renji something from her own plate asking something or other about the menu for tomorrow, and it’s so wildly domestic. Ichigo can suddenly see into the future, twenty years from now, youth still clinging to them like it ever does to Shinigami, and so blissfully in love, it’s a perfect window and she is there intruding, and that thought, snaps some of her control. 

“Ichi” Renji is staring at her worriedly, what, why. 

Someone is clearing their throat, and it must be Byakuya, because Renji fumbles “Ichigo I mean, uh, are you ok?” she snaps out of it, ah, apparently she also snapped her chopsticks. Well, fuck… what are these the Kuchiki family chopsticks? Were they an heirloom?! Her eyes grow huge as she holds the broken ends on her hand, its frozen and she thinks they are not particularly fancy, but who knows with Kuchiki nobles and their love of functionality. Byakuya is going to kill her if Rukia doesn’t get to her first.  
She can feel her face warming up. 

“Uh, yeah, sorry, hah! I think I just slipped, its hard remembering how much stronger I am here! Haha!” it falls a little flat, but she has been awkward and loud as long as they have known her so perhaps it won’t come out as weird. Please god let them drop it. 

So Rukia and Renji are getting married, the ceremony is beautiful, Ichigo is happy for them truly, regret and jealousy are barely there. An aftertaste to all the happiness that surrounds them, Rukia looks lovely in her wedding attire, Renji looks regal. She remembers the first time she met him, Ichigo is faintly amused, this is the man who has taken Rukia away from her twice over now. 

The first two hours of the wedding happen in a blur of bells, paper, kneeling and bowing. Ichigo is not sure she didn’t make a fool of herself in front of Rukia’s family. Her back feels stiff, almost as much as her face, having her hair pulled back and up in this knot is not something she is used to. The formal part of the affair is over, and friends and well, Byakuya are all who remain, taking full advantage of the after party to actually relax and celebrate with the happy couple. 

So Ichigo is not hiding, not really, but the music was getting too loud, and Renji kept pouring her sake, that stupid brilliant smile of his not diming. And Rukia, the bride now dressed in a beautiful red kimono with a wonderful white obi tied very squarely and appropriate for a woman of her station, kept asking her to dance. Ichigo is not weak, and she has tried to hide everything for their sake, but they must see the heartbreak in her eyes, there is no way they would be paying so much attention to her otherwise.  
The ceremony was beautiful, the promise of a new life together on full glory, petals falling gently on the bride and groom. She will never forget it, it settles deep in her bones, the truth that for all that here is true joy for them, the sorrow is overwhelming. She walks back to the gardens  
“Byakuya, what are you doing here?” 

The taicho walks out of the shadows, quiet steps that seem to whisper on the soft grass, whatever they are saying is lost on her. 

“Renji was looking for you, Rukia asked me to come get you.” His voice is leveled, he could be thrilled that his sister is married, or mad at Ichigo for ditching the party, he could be wasted for all Ichigo knows. She grunts in acknowledgment, not really caring to move right now, she doesn’t turn around to face Byakuya, and she can tell it amuses him.  
“Why am I here Byakuya?” the words escape her; they had been swimming around in her head since the moment she arrived. She knows it’s too honest, feels the shame of her brashness hot on her skin, to her horror she can feel her eyes well up. It’s been too much. 

“They love you, you were wanted here,” there is a very awkward pause, and she is certain the only reason Rukia asked Byakuya to come fetch her is because he could very possibly out maneuver her while she is wearing this ridiculous kimono and drag her back. Otherwise the plan is shit, Byakuya is shit at this. 

“Go away”. Her voice doesn’t break, but it comes out a little too quiet, and she can hear his footsteps walking slow and graceful. 

“You should go back Ichigo” 

She turns around. 

“Where are your manners Taicho?” 

Byakuya walks impossibly closer, she feels like nothing right now is real, not the sad smile in Byakuya´s face, not the softness of his hands, or the handkerchief he uses to gently dry her cheeks. Ichigo feels drunk unable to understand what is happening, getting hung up on the smallest of details. What the fuck is he doing, he is slow, so fucking slow, and she would have never imagined such tenderness from him. Her mind gets stuck on useless details, like how he smells faintly of sake, the sweet floral smell of the bottle Renji kept trying to pour for her. She notices a little fox embroidered in red near his collar, its wild, there is a tiny fox leaping near his collar, suddenly she has the delusional conviction to touch it, and her hands are there before she can stop them. 

“You must excuse me Kurosaki-kun” his eyes are soft and his hand is warm where it remains touching her cheek. She knows he can see her blush spreading, the heat she feels spreading down her neck, if she were anyone else in Soul Society she would perhaps shiver and look away coyly. But she was teasing him, and she won’t back down, for the first time since she saw Rukia in her wedding kimono she feels a little like herself. But… there is a small freckle on the side of Byakuyas nose, and perhaps she is going mad.  
“Byakuya” she is not completely sure where this is going, but there is a red fox on his collar, and the left corner of his mouth looks like a place to start. His hair is long, so fucking long, and fuck if she has lost enough, she can have this to remember the night for something other than heartbreak. Even if it is a mistake. 

Her hand moves fast, enough to startle him, perhaps he mistook her motions for a solid punch, but her fingers curl with all her strength, she has a fistful of his hair, and Byakuya blinks once before he submits to her, tension she hadn’t notice before leaving his shoulders. She searches into his eyes, there are things she can’t read, not right now, but there is expectation there, Ichigo doesn’t leave him hanging for too long. 

Kissing Byakuya Kuchiki is nothing like she has ever experienced before, for all his stoicism and formality, his tongue is hot and unyielding. There is an edge to the kiss that is making her mad, her blood is boiling for more and she can’t really compare it to anything other than fighting for her life. She is standing on her toes, an admirable example of her balance, but Byakuya seems to think she would be better off curling around him. He’s not wrong, the moment his hands grab her waist and pull her gently, closer to him, she moans. It falls on them like kerosene, they break apart, his eyes are wide, his mouth is open and Ichigo, drenched in madness wants to see him suck her fingers. The thought drops like oil coating everything in her, she can feel herself getting wet, her thighs growing sticky with the desire of having Byakuya Kuchiki tending to her digits.  
She is going mad; this wedding has unmade her. 

“Byakuya, take me somewhere quiet” fuck me, she doesn’t say, but it’s a near thing, she would be happy to stay here in the Kuchiki gardens. But something tells her they are expected, that someone will come looking if they are here for too long. 

“I came here to retrieve you,” 

“So take me. They have each other; they won’t miss me” Ichigo is not sulking, it’s simply the truth as far as she knows it, she is not needed, not now.  
Byakuya wants to say something, she can tell by the way his eyes avoid hers before he talks again, “As you wish”. He changes the grip on her body, grabs her by what is in all intended purposes a bridal carry, this sounds familiar, and Princess Bride comes unbidden to her, this is what a stroke must feel like. 

“Hold on” Byakuya is back to his cold serious demeanor, but then his face tilts just enough to let her in on the little smirk he’s porting, the playfulness takes her by surprise. But she’s game, she laughs joyously and tucks her face on his chest, her long sleeved kimono falls elegantly, hiding his hands. 

Clear as day, she knows what a sight they make, and what a scandal it would be. 

In a blur they leave, her laugh traveling with them, and what she feels is his chuckle with soft amusement, it doesn’t take long, but when she opens her eyes she takes in everything, there is a giggle stuck in her throat that can’t be indulged. They are in his office, and it’s not disappointment the thing that sits uneasily on her belly, she understands why they didn’t go to his room, but Ichigo expected a guestroom. It’s an unusual selection, there are few reasons why he would pick somewhere so far away and well, she thinks with delirious joy, unprofessional as it is, it thrills her. 

He lets her down, not putting too much distance between them but seemingly the surroundings are making him sober up. Her heart is pounding nonstop, she can feel her heartbeat pulsing everywhere, the unexpected, very much like the quiet before a battle, makes her body swell.  
“Kurosaki-kun”  
“Ichigo, Byakuya, call me by my name.” She invades, she conquers, he takes a small step back. Ichigo knows he is indulging her right now, doesn’t delve too much on if he likes taking orders from her or if it’s the request for familiarity what unravels the taicho. But she feels devious, she kisses him like the world is ending, and in a way it is. Lips locked and mind focused on the wonderful pressure of his body on hers, she lets her fingers travel. The fabric on his Kimono is soft, a luxury on her fingertips, but she keeps coming to that tiny fox on his neck. The kiss tastes a lot like heartbreak, so Ichigo pulls and sucks and moans until it fades. 

Her hair is up on a complicated knot, leaving her nape exposed to his warm hands. The way they keep caressing her make her shiver in delight. He touches her like she hasn’t make him bleed, like they haven’t unleashed their Bankais on each other. Like they don’t know each other, like she is something delicate. It makes her want to cut him to remember her edges, but it also kind of makes her want to treasure his tenderness and offer hers in return. 

Then the motherfucker bites her. The moan that tears from her is nothing short of obscene, and she pulls him closer to her, her hand moving wildly to touch him. There is too much between them, her obi feels constrictive, all the layers she is wearing feel taunting, she grabs Byakuya by the collar of his kimono, opening it as far as it will go without untying it, his neck is warm and soft and the sound he makes when she licks it is something between a sigh and a grunt. 

“Ichigo…” his voice is deep, his hands are holding her, pushing her up against his desk, she hops on it, before he can stir them into something tender she holds the hem of her kimono and the rest of the layers she´s wearing. The movement however seems to startle the taicho, he stares at her legs transfixed.

“Yo, what are you waiting for?” for all her rude words, her embarrassment grows with every second Rukia’s brother keeps his eyes locked on her legs. Perhaps this was too forward, but for god’s sake the man brought her here. Maybe he has come to his senses, perhaps he will come to his senses and apologize, leave her wet and mortified and go back to the wedding. Fuck. Perhaps he will-

Ichigo’s throat goes dry as Byakuya moves with more grace than she thinks is necessary to kneel between her open legs. 

“I’ve never seen these before” his breath is hitting the side of her left thigh, exactly where her stockings end on a fine lace. It’s not anything she would ever have worn before, but Tatsuki had given them to her back when they had decided to give it a go and well they hadn’t lasted long, and a lot of mistakes were made but it had been nice for a while.  
“Uh… do you…. not like them or something?” her blood is boiling with anticipation, a captain kneeling for her stockings is not an unwanted power trip. Ichigo can feel the blush traveling down her neck, what she wants right there and now is Byakua’s lips on her. 

Calloused fingers touch her, caress the lace, there is something like worship behind every movement he makes, softly probing. Inspecting the way they compress her thighs, it’s an exercise in patience. But as soon as he had knelt for her, he rises, there is fire on his eyes, his face otherwise impassive, it’s a very Byakuya thing to do. 

His hands share similar scars to her own, but they are bigger, they crawl slowly, they caress her skin, he touches her very hot, very wet underwear. He seems once again baffled.  
“I…it didn’t seem very decent to… not wear them.” She is blushing again her body arching as he slips a finger on the side, suddenly caressing her, spreading the mess further. The noise he lets out is something hellish, it burns her, and then his forehead is pressed against her, air gets trapped and heated. His knuckle keeps moving, brushing up against her, the friction wonderful and not enough, it keeps parting her lips, nearly brushing up against her clitoris before sliding back down again. 

“Byakuya…” more pleading than complaining, a lot of things can be said about Byakuya, she would never have guessed a tease would be one of them.

He keeps touching her with just one finger, his other hand holding her hip, she takes advantage to pull him out of his hakama, but he stills her hands with one of his. He pulls away like it pains him, he takes one look at her, there is a smirk coloring his expression, an honest to god smirk, but before she can ask he is hooking his fingers on the hem of her underwear and pulling them off from her. They fall somewhere near her feet, she kicks them under the desk, the moon is coming from the window, Ichigo is certain he can see her, red and glistening, and the hunger that is there in his eyes make her toes curl. 

He moves fast, and suddenly he is back between her legs, cock free a hot and solid pressing near her entrance. She is gasping, nervous and not quite believing this is happening. But Byakuya stops, holds her face with tender fingertips and kisses her like they been doing this all their lives. 

She can’t believe she is about to do this, can’t believe this is happening now, not with Byakuya, and not in his office. A thick finger teases her, parting lips and penetrating he, expertly pushing and probing with all the accuracy of a marksman. Her very loud and lewd mewls make Byakuya’s lips curl, it doesn’t take much before he is adding a second finger. 

“Byakuya, enough” a moan, a grunt, his fingers curl upwards pushing her closer and closer to orgasm. “Please” 

“As you wish” the taicho is gentle as he removes his fingers, holds himself and pushes into her. 

Princess Bride, the thought comes again like poison in her head, it makes her laugh, a joyous sound that turns into a pleasurable moan halfway through. Byakuya is economic in his movements, he fucks like he fights, every single hit intentional, and Ichigo appreciates it, really, it makes for very efficient pleasure, but she wants him desperate, a writhing mess just like her. 

“Taicho” She curls her legs around him, mouth coming close to his ear, teeth sinking sinfully on the soft velvety skin of the lobe of his ear. The groan, the deep push of his hips, everything makes her eyes roll to the back of her head. 

“Ichigo” Half name, half kiss, big hand curling around her neck, she comes with him still thrusting, chasing after his own climax. He stills, and she clenches around him, hot warmth pooling inside her, he comes with a deep groan, Ichigo closes her eyes, and awkwardly hugs him.  
Byakuya huffs a soft laugh, his breathing takes some time to slow down, the moment drives her with unexpected tenderness. She holds his head close, cradling him and caressing his hair. Her eyes grow damp again, he closes his. They stay like that for a while.

He pulls out from her, taking with him a string of cum that joins the mess in her thighs. Byakuya chases it down with his eyes, offers a hand for her to stand, Ichigo raises an eyebrow but takes it. Her kimono falls back down and Byakuya moves like a man devoted to an altar goddess to divest her from all the layers that cover her body.  
The embarrassment that assaults her feels out of place, but she can’t help herself, she has his cum dripping out of her, and still this seems to her more intimate than anything, the gentle way he is unwrapping her, freeing her from her obi and all the silk. Placing a kiss here and there, a soft caress or a methodical removal of clothing. The thought is unwelcomed, but she feels like a bride being unwrapped by her beloved. She wants to dilute whatever this is with acid rudeness, but Byakuya ruins it when he is taking of the very last layers, uncovering her chest and tracing all the still visible scars left by Senbonsakura. Like he has them committed to memory, she stops his tender tracing, forces herself to stare at him, hard, unyielding. 

“What’s done is done, I have bled before, I will bleed again, I hold no anger, you won’t make me bleed again” she knows he understand the promise, the grateful serenity that takes hold of his eyes would have been more than enough for her, but he nods and then kneels for her once more.  
“I swear” He is so solemn, she really wants to laugh, but holds in the urge. 

“I do not like to be kept waiting, cold naked and standing, either dress me back or fuck me again” She crosses her arms over her cold breasts.  
“As you wish” There is amusement there, Ichigo swears if Byakuya were a little less of a noble man he would be laughing at her imperious demands.  
She divests him quickly, there is no ceremony on the way she tears his clothes away from his body, but from the complicit way he keeps walking out of clothes and helping her untie things, Ichigo is pretty sure Byakuya agrees with her fast paced rhythm. 

They have sex once more before they return to the party. Not before Ichigo panics about redressing herself, she can’t tie her own kimono, and the fukura-suzume musubi on her obi was completely beyond her skills. 

But before she can stress herself any further Byakuya takes her obi from her, “Hold it right here” With outstanding grace he wrapped everything in place, going slowly but with the steady focus of someone who knew what they were doing. “There, we can return now.” Byakuya unceremoniously put on his kimono, before walking straight up to Ichigo, he held her close before taking a fast paced shunpo back to the Kuchiki estate. 

Byakuya lets her down near her own room for the night before disappearing entirely. 

The music is still loud and the party is still going, but she can´t imagine going back there. So she walks to her room but is found before she can get there, Kisuke is insistent and nags at her that she should stay a while more, dance with the bride and groom. But she can´t muster the strength to do so, she keeps walking past him, she can´t stay here. She is going home, she will write them something and leave it in her room. It feels like running away, and it tastes bitter. “It´s not like we won’t be seeing each other again, what are 50 to 70 years to a Shinigami?” Ichigo is leaving and she gives a little dismissive goodbye motion to Kisuke, not bothering to turn around, she is going home. 

“With a loved one Kurosaki kun, they are everything.” His voice is soft enough that perhaps it´s lost on the soft breeze of the night. As she walks away, Kisuke notices Ichigo´s obi is tied in a different knot, claimed it proclaims. Well, it may have been for the best that she didn´t return to the party then, the bride and groom would´ve been crushed. 

She goes back to the world of the living, her body is warm in bed, her kimono is gone, her hair is down and the small bitemark Byakuya had claimed is gone. Like a dream it’s all gone, might as well move on. 

Ichigo can tell it’s not the beginning of a wonderful fairytale, but she doesn’t need it, she can be the former warrior, the savior, she can live her full life in the land on the living, and only once she is done here return to the Kuckikis and Renji. But she will be forever thankful of the memory of Byakuya overlapping the hollow ache of losing what she never truly had. Who knows, perhaps in a few decades the ache will be gone, perhaps after a couple of lovers, she could have her own family before coming back again to Soul Society.

She feels at peace with everything, not expecting to see any of them for a while. It’s perhaps why she almost loses her step and breaks her neck when she bumps into Byakuya, Kuchiki Taicho of the 6th in a fucking nightclub. His hands stop her from hurting herself, saving her from at least a broken ankle. He looks like something out of a fantasy, or perhaps this time she really is having a stroke. He lets a smile break slowly, one that is mirrored on her face, she could try to ask him what’s he doing there, he could lie, or worse, he could tell her some nonsense about checking in. Ichigo laughs before she’s kissing him.

**Author's Note:**

> -Renji finds Ichigos knickers on the office, he freaks out and hides them on his hakama.


End file.
